It takes a village to raise a child

As I sat down to type tonight...I thought my brain was just too tired to write anything intelligibly.



But my thoughts were quickly inspired by some of my dear friends' facebook statuses.


Many were venting about the perils of mommyhood. They were tired, they were stressed, they were worried about getting through bathtime and bedtime without their husbands with their one, two or three kids.


This was not just ONE status I read, but multiple updates echoed the same type of messages.


I thought about it for a while and I wondered a few things - do we have unreal expectations of what motherhood is supposed to be?


Are we kidding ourselves when we think that we will be rested? Do we really believe we'll be fulfilled in every moment? Do people really think it's easy?


Of course it's not.

Any person with a child knows that raising children is nothing but easy.


Then it dawned on me -- these statuses that I read were actually positive.


These moms likely did not have unreal expectations; quite the opposite actually.


They fully realize their struggles and I can only hope in that moment they realized they were not and ARE not alone. Furthermore, these moms were brave and honest enough to speak their truths, and by doing so they (likely unknowingly) reached out to other moms.


I found it somewhat empowering - how many times is a picture of perfection painted of a year off work for maternity leave? How many times do people lie about what really happens behind closed doors? How does the idealization of the "perfect" life really help anyone in the end?


These facebook updates, even though they're on a social network are conveying very important messages. First, rarely is there anything in parenting or mothering that is easy. Next, it's okay to be honest about what motherhood is really about. Finally, the most important message to me is it's okay to ask for help.


It takes a village to raise a child! This African proverb teaches us something invaluable. No mom, dad or family is an island. It's okay to feel overwhelmed, it's okay to feel stressed, it's okay to have a little cry on your way into work because leaving your kids to work full-time is the hardest decision you make every day.


Admitting there are imperfections, and admitting you need help is a noble step, asking for it is the most intelligent and important.


I love this proverb and it reiterates the wonderful idea of moms and dads, families and communities joining together to help one another raise the healthiest and secure little people we possible can. In the meantime, it sure helps moms & dads understand they're NOT alone.